By: Haqqseeker
Source: Muslimvillage.com
Allah Most High with His infinite Mercy has endowed us, humans, with numerous bounties. One of the most spectacular bounties is the period of youth. That is the prime time of our life. In fact, we can call it the most crucial stage of our life.
The period of youth is a time when a person undergoes many emotional as well as physical changes. That is the time when the emotions, the strength, the gullibility, attractions towards acts which are prohibited – the list is endless – are at their climax. In short, the time of youth is such a period when a person starts thinking he is on top of the world and he can do whatever he likes, whenever he likes as long as his ‘Nafs’ (the inner egotistic self) gets satisfied. Shaytan (Satan) is very crafty. He makes the maximum use of this period of human life to entrap and mislead the human beings into committing haram acts.
Regarding some of the unlawful acts Allah Most High in the Qur’an Kareem says:
“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). That is purer for them. Verily, Allah is All-Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.)…” [Qur’an 24:30-31].
For the reason that youth is the prime time of our life, it is also very precious to Allah Most High.
Imagine standing outside on a very hot day under the sun for hours on end. We would definitely want some shadow to rest under. But what about that Day when the sun will be much closer to us and the heat will be much more intense. Wouldn’t we very strongly desire a shade on that day? Of course we would!
Allah has prepared a shade on the Day of Judgment for those people who worship Allah in their youth. On that Day, there will be no other shade except the shade of the Throne of Allah.
To save the youth from getting involved in illicit relationships by which he can destroy his afterlife, Allah Most High has kept a sacred social contract between a Muslim man and a Muslim woman. This sacred contract is called ‘Nikah’ in Islam.
Allah has created men and women as company for one another so that they can procreate and live in peace and tranquility according to the commandments of Allah and the directions of His Messenger (Allah’s peace be upon him). Allah says in the Qur’an:
“And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect”. [Qur’an 30:21]. “And Allah has made for you wives of your own kind, and has made for you, from your wives, sons and grandsons, and has bestowed on you good provision.” [Qur’an 16:72]
These verses of Qur’an Kareem clearly show that in contrast to other religions like Christianity, Buddhism, and Judaism etc. which consider celibacy (not marrying for religious reasons) as a great virtue and a means of salvation, Islam considers marriage as one of the most virtuous and approved institutions.
No other religion in the entire human history has accorded the status and dignity that Islam has accorded to marriage. This is evident from the following Hadith: ‘It is narrated by Anas (Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah (Allah’s peace be upon him) said: “When a man marries, he has fulfilled half of his religion, so let him fear Allah regarding the remaining half.”’
The Muslim youth should refrain from making acquaintances with members of the opposite sex. The concept of dating has no place in Islam. In fact, the word ‘dating’ should not exist at all in Islamic dictionary. Gender inter-mingling is also not allowed in Islam and as such Muslims should also avoid attending mixed gatherings.
“How do we find our future partner without having relationship with the opposite sex, without dating?” some of the modern thinking youth influenced by the western culture may ask.
The answer is simple. If you are looking for a spouse do not make connection with the opposite sex, make connection with Allah. Develop taqwa (God-fearingness) and ask Allah to guide you towards finding the right spouse for you.
Now the question is: what should we look for in a person we want to choose as our marriage partner? A beautiful Hadith gives the answer to this question:
Abu Hurairah (Allah be pleased with him) related that Nabi (Allah’s peace be upon him) said: “Men choose women for four reasons: for their money, for their rank, for their beauty and for their religion, but marry one who is religious and you will succeed” (Bukhari, Muslim).
This of course, applies to women as well.
Marriage is not something to throw yourself into all by yourself. Getting the help of someone, especially parents, relatives, an Imam, and/or respected and trustworthy members of the Muslim community to either look for the right spouse or to initiate and participate in a communication process is very important. However, we should strictly avoid looking for a spouse by means of the social networking websites like Facebook and WhatsApp. These are nothing but means of creating Fitnah in society and youth should avoid socializing with ghair-mahram men/women (i.e. men and women who are not relatives barred from marriage) through the means of these social networks.
When you meet the man/lady you intend to marry, see that you are not alone. Nabi (Allah’s peace be upon him) said: “Whenever a man is alone with a woman the Shaytan makes a third” (Tirmidhi).
He also advised men: “Not one of you should meet a woman alone unless she is accompanied by a relative within the prohibited degrees” (Bukhari, Muslim).
One very essential advice to all the people who are looking for suitable spouse is: before taking any step always make Istikhara (a prayer seeking Divine help regarding a decision). In fact Istakhara should be performed before taking any major step in our life
In conclusion, here is an advice to all Muslim youth that at the time of the marriage please adhere to the Sunnah of our beloved Prophet (Allah’s peace be upon him). We should avoid spending money unnecessarily.
In fact, wasting Allah’s bounties is something Allah has warned us against: “Do not act extravagantly; surely Allah does not love the extravagant” (Qur’an 6:141)
We should keep our wedding ceremonies as simple as possible. That way the blessing and the assistance of Allah Most High will inshaAllah descend upon us in our future married life.
May Allah Glorified and Exalted guide the younger generation on the Straight Path, bless them with an unblemished youth and a blissful future married life based on Taqwa and Sincerity. Amīn.
And Allah Most High Knows Best.